The Vidai-less Lockdown Wedding
Story by Isha Sharma
I met my partner 4 years ago somewhere you normally don’t expect to find a life partner – on Tinder. We have been together ever since and have been planning our wedding for the last 3 years. We got engaged in June 2019 in a grand memorable ceremony and we wanted our wedding to be even grander with lots of band baaja!
Our wedding was fixed for April 18, 2020, and we just couldn’t wait to tie the knot! Everything was ready – the venue, wedding attire, invitations, and wedding favors. We were all set to go but never did we imagine that COVID-19 would cripple the world so bad that it would spill cold water over our plans!
Back in February, when things weren’t as bad, I asked my family to prepone the wedding but no one took the threat of the pandemic seriously. No one thought it would affect us but when the lockdown started, both me and my partner, were extremely stressed out. Since we both lived in different states (Delhi and UP), we couldn’t even meet each other due to the lockdown. We didn’t want to wait so we knew we had to find a way to get married ASAP.
But the lockdown kept getting extended and caused us intense sadness and anxiety as we had to stay apart. We even considered getting a court marriage but even the government offices were shut. When we heard that the restrictions would be eased in May, we quickly scrambled to go ahead with the ceremony! But first, we had yet another challenge to overcome. We had to cross three state borders and required special permits to do so.
We got the permissions on May 5 and got married on the auspicious day of Budh Purnima on May 7 at my home. With only 14 people in attendance, we live streamed our wedding to the rest of the family. We always wanted our wedding to be unique but we never imagined that this is how it would turn out.
My partner wore an indo-western fusion outfit and I picked a simple sharara suit for my bridal trousseau. I did my own makeup and my mom did my hair. My parents also cooked together and we all did the floral decoration by ourselves. We even managed to have a post-wedding shoot in a park in front of my house.
Being a feminist, I am against some of the sexist aspects of Indian weddings and didn’t want to follow those patriarchal traditions. We skipped both, the Vidai and Kanyadaan. Women are not anyone’s property to be given away to another family. My father even told the panditji to not use the word kanyadaan. I left my house happy and not crying. Many of our virtual guests told us that they had never attended such a beautiful wedding.
In these uncertain times, our wedding provided us hope and we were thankful for being together even though it was under quarantine. Once things go back to normal, we will have a big celebration with our family and friends as I didn’t get to do a lot of things last year such as dressing up as the bride.
Till then, we’re having the time of our lives TOGETHER and a vidai-less lockdown wedding ultimately proved to be the best spontaneous decision we ever made!