Strong Soul in scary (Lovely) Night
The world is as scary as it is lovely. That’s the truth but whether to perceive the dark side as the ultimate reality depends on you, depends on the mastermind - your brain.
The brain is the most complicated organ of the human body. It is the epicenter of happiness, despair, envy, love; every single emotion you feel. I realized the power of my brain when I felt my heart pounding anxiously one minute and then back to normal the other. I used to be impulsive all the time and felt some kind of heaviness in my chest. I didn’t know what exactly I was suffering until I got diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder.
I suffered from anxiety I think almost my entire childhood till the age of 25 when I realized what I was suffering from. I was helpless at first but then found a psychiatrist online. Reading the reviews and trusting the digital world, I went to see the doctor with the hope of becoming me again. I wanted the pain inside me to stop, stop for once.
But call it a social stigma, taboo, or whatever, the psychiatrist told my parents that I was just showing some random tantrums. I was left shocked and withered from the inside. My parents blamed me for all the drama my mental disorder had caused the family.
They were as if fed up with me and my problems. But deep down I knew that my issues were no tantrums. I wasn’t doing any drama. The pain was real, deep down it was shattering my soul into pieces. But slowly I realized that I have to pick those shattered pieces one by one to build
Society is filled with stereotypes up to the brink. When hope becomes a blur and you start feeling alone you have to become your own sunshine. You have to pick yourself from the dark and push towards the light. Fortunately for me, I did undergo a good psychiatric treatment along with anxiety counseling and here I am at the age of 29. I am not as impulsive as before and certainly calmer. I don’t feel the heaviness or tightness in my chest as I used to so often. I feel stronger inside than before. I am proud of the person I have become today - strong and confident.
If you are dealing with any mental disorder, hold on to the inner you. Don’t let the brain master your emotions. It’s up to you to hold on to the scattered soul and bind it, stronger than ever.